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Monday
Jul052010

How To Avoid The Worst Dating Mistake Guys Make!

 

A Horror Story

 

A dear friend of mine, Sara (the names have been changed to protect the innocent) was divorced a few years ago, and she is back on the dating scene.

Recently, she was excited over accepting a first date with Mark, her new neighbor.

When we had lunch the day after the big event, I asked her how it went. "Terez," she sighed, "The evening started out great.  

Mark is a very attractive, put-together guy. We met at an excellent restaurant we decided on. However, things went downhill quickly when I made the mistake of asking what he did for a living."  Uh-oh.

Sara proceeded, "With that simple question I was subjected to a 30 minute lecture of not only what he did, but also what professional awards he has won, how much he  earned last year, what make of luxury car he prefers, how often he works out, and I even know what brand of deordorant he likes!"

Suffice to say, Sara assured me there will most definitely not be a second date with Mark.

 

The Critical Mistake

 

Mark made one of the worst mistakes many guys do on the first (or any other) date: dominating the conversation, or as Sara aptly put it, making the entire evening "all about you!"

Gentlemen, I still think we fail to fully realize how much of a turn-off this is to women.  When we hijack a conversation we appear to be:

  • Arrogant
  • Egotistical
  • Rude
  • Competely self-absorbed

Not very attractive qualities are they? Yet due to a misguided need to impress or appear more interesting, guys will unwittingly create the opposite impression.

The sad end result is watching your date leave skid marks while escaping through the nearest exit.

Not good.

 

 Course Correction

 

Fortunately, the best way to guarantee you do not make this mistake is remembering that great conversation is always a two-way street.  Here are some important tips to help make sure your date goes well:

  1. Maintain eye contact with her.  No matter what she is wearing or how she is wearing it, avoid undressing her with your eyes. Not doing so will make her feel as though you are not taking her seriously. Of course compliment her on her appearance, but keep those eyes up!
  2. Ask her interesting questions.
  3. Listen to what she is saying without thinking of your next witty response. 
  4. Try to avoid talking about highly sensitive topics such as religion or politics, unless both of your professions are in related fields.

 

Finally

 

Being a good conversationalist is a great way to ensure both you and your date enjoy the experience. By following the tips above and being yourself, you will increase your chances for achieving the dating success you really want!

What do you think is the worst dating mistake guys make?  Please share your opinions with us by commenting below!

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RELATED POSTS

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Reader Comments (4)

LOL. The worst dating mistake guys make? I think you've hit on some of the biggies in your article. But, it's hard to believe how many more there are. Have you seen Dating in the Dark on ABC? It's second season of six episodes starts on August 9, 2010. People are Twittering excitedly about it in the Twitter scrolling widget on http://datinginthedark.org/.
August 1, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDating in the Dark fan
DITDF, Oh yes, I am well aware that guys commit many other no-nos on dates. However, being self-centered has a special place on the dating wall of shame.
August 2, 2010 | Registered CommenterTerez
yes I agree with that but, pauses in conversation are equally as damaging and some females prefer to listen and are not always wanting to dominate the conversation.. Good if you can find that happy medium.. http://www.safer-online-dating-services.com/
August 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteronlinedatingguru
My feeling is great conversation requires participation from both parties, with neither trying to dominate. Actively listening to your partner, asking sincere questions and answering the same serves to break the ice and make the both of you more comfortable during your date.
August 3, 2010 | Registered CommenterTerez

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